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Subject: [rec.humor.funny] Let's Go software releases
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Now that we are doing City releases too...



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Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny
From: mkwan@cs.mu.OZ.AU (Matthew Kwan)
Subject: Let's Go software releases
Keywords: chuckle, computers
Message-ID: <Sb61.6fd@clarinet.com>
Date: Thu, 7 Aug 97 19:30:01 EDT

Internally, Microsoft has been naming its products after cities, with
names such as "Memphis", and "Cairo".

If this trend takes off in the software industry as a whole, we may
see some more cynical names being used ...


"Bataan" -	A team of programmers pull a series of all-nighters and
		drive themselves to the point of collapse in order to meet
		the release date.

"Stalingrad" -	The project turns out to be far more difficult than
		expected. Management responds by assigning more and more
		programmers to the development effort, but it ultimately
		fails.

"Dresden" -	The company that originally owned the product goes down in
		flames. As part of the liquidation, the product ends up in
		the hands of a competitor, who severely mismanages it.

"Beirut" -	Internal squabbling among the programmers turns the project
		into a basket case. Senior management comes in, kicks some
		heads, and gets the project back on track. But the
		programmers still hate each other.

"Carthage" -	After two previously unsuccessful releases, a third version
		of the product is released. This also fails. The project's
		programmers are dispersed, and the product's name is never
		spoken again.

"Jerusalem" -	The ultimate legacy application. Generations of hacks,
		fixes, patches, different operating systems, and changes
		of management have produced an application that is
		completely unmaintainable.

"Mumbai" -	For reasons best known to themselves, marketing tries to
		sell an existing well-known product under a new name. The
		typical response from customers is a blank stare, followed
		by "Oh, you mean Bombay".

"Nanking" -	After the developers fail to produce a successful product,
		management punishes the guilty and innocent alike with
		mass sackings.

-- 
Selected by Jim Griffith.  MAIL your joke to funny@clari.net.

This newsgroup is sponsored by ClariNet Communications Corp.  Read about
The Internet Joke Book -- the best of RHF at http://www.clari.net/inetjoke.html

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